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Facing Your Biases For Better Nursing and Self Care

The nurse role offers you a wonderful way of deepening your experience with others and yourself as you meet your self care needs. “Back in the 1980s, Salman Rushdie wrote that the defining figure of the 20th century was the migrant.” A few month’s ago the institution I work for offered a diversity training which began my awakening to my own unconscious biases. Recently combining HeartMath and a 21 day challenge to increase my experience and understanding of inclusion sponsored by Kindspring.com , I discovered that inclusion involves an intimacy with my own biases.  

Surprised to discover subtle prejudices despite having worked over 40 years with people of many cultures and abilities, I was uncomfortable and also realized that moving out of my comfort zone meant growth. Self care includes the usual physical options such as improving diet, sleep, and exercise, and taking care of emotional and mental education and well-being. More aware of personal biases, I now listen to the news differently and relate to my colleagues and patients with greater sensitivity, showing up with greater authenticity and kindness as a result.

As a nurse you are responsible for knowing, meeting and advocating for your needs. This means dealing with your fears, concerns and biases which can show up as emotional and mental attitudes that reduce the quality of your patient care. The intellectual knowledge that you are helping, can obscure subtle biases, but these times require us to provide optimum care to everyone. We all have biases, and often they are unconscious. There is evidence that when health care providers are not aware of  their biases,  they actually decrease the quality of the care provided. Hospitals and other health care organizations are now required to offer diversity training. The vision of the CMS OMH (Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services Office of Minority Health) is to eliminate disparities in health care quality and access through the development, implementation and evaluation of programs and policies that incorporate the needs and voices of the populations they serve.  I encourage you to participate in diversity trainings that are offered because they can be illuminating though perhaps initially uncomfortable.

If you don’t have access to diversity trainings, you can discover some biases by honestly exploring your own thoughts and behaviors as you answer the following questions:

Do you speak about people/patients who are not like you, differently when you are in their presence as opposed to outside their hearing?

What are your feelings about a wall between the US and Mexico?

Do you offer your nursing care with an open heart?  What does being open hearted mean for you?

What are your feelings about the LGBTQ people?

What are your feelings about transgender people serving in the military?

What are your feelings about Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals?

Are you educated about institutional and systemic racism, oppression and white supremacy?

How comfortable are you talking about these issues with others?

You can also learn more about these topics by checking out the following on line sites:

As a nurse you protect those you care for from all forms of harm as if they are a members of your family. Remember, your inner state, your core beliefs make a difference in how you relate to the world and your work. We all act out our unconscious inclusion issues.  Nowadays, in this global community, we in fact are one human family.

If you are experiencing any discomfort, please take time to be kind to yourself and work with it. I invite you to join me in taking the 7 day Bias Cleanse in the next week.

You are welcome to join our Wednesdays
6:30-7:00 pm EST
Free Virtual Connecting Weekly Call-in for Nurses

                   Self Care for Vitality
Phone 712-432-3066          Pin 177444
On this weekly phone call there is a short guided relaxation, followed by a short time for silence
in community and optional sharing
 We present tips and strategies for Self care on a variety of topics such as:
Setting boundaries, balance, healing, self love, vulnerability, and other topics as they arise.
It’s free to all and you can join in with a share or just listen in.

Take good care of your beautiful self this week and always.
With love, Padma
 

American Horror Story: “Ratched”

  • “Sandy Summers and the “Truth About Nursing” have provided information about the planned Netflix series reviving the image of “nurse Ratched,” once portrayed in the infamous film “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.”  Sandy Summers is the leading voice on nursing and the media, and her analysis of what is in the works is a “must read.”  So head on over to her post now to learn the facts, and about important ways to participate in activism on nursing and the media.”   https://nursemanifest.com/
  • In FILMSPETITIONS
  • September 8, 2017
  • 632 Views

Netflix and Ryan Murphy plan two-season TV origin story for one of the most damaging anti-nurse stereotypes in history

September 7, 2017 – Today media sources reported that Netflix bought the new Ryan Murphy project “Ratched,” which will be an origin story based on the archetypal battle-axe nurse character from Ken Kesey’s novel and Milos Forman’s film One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest (1975). The New York Times reported that Netflix has committed to at least two seasons and 18 episodes of creator Evan Romansky’s show. Production is planned to begin in 2018 and trace the title character’s “evolution from a low-level nurse into the severe, manipulative tyrant who terrorizes mental institution patients in Ken Kesey’s 1962 novel.” Varietyreported that the story would start in 1947, and that longtime Murphy collaborator Sarah Paulson would play the title character. Among the producers is Hollywood star Michael Douglas, who was one of the producers of the original Cuckoo’s Nest film. Unfortunately, Nurse Ratched embodies the enduring battle-axe stereotype of nursing, the idea that any female nurse in authority must be a repressed maternal tyrant bent on torturing patients and emasculating innocent, freedom-loving men in order to resolve some unseen psychosexual damage in her own life. Michael Douglas and Saul ZaentzDeeply misogynous in its linking of female power with insidious oppression, the two-dimensional portrayal has spawned countless copies and variations in ensuing decades, right up to recent television shows like Grey’s Anatomy. Needless to say, it would take extraordinary skill and care to make a show about this character and not have it cause serious damage to nursing. Is that likely? Ryan Murphy’s track record on nursing does not inspire confidence; consider his damaging misportrayals on Glee (2). Of course, it would be a mistake to assume this is just another example of the blatant misogyny that appears to have overrun too much of the nation’s discourse over the last year or so, although we suppose that might help the show find an audience. Murphy has done thoughtful work and shown some concern for women’s issues and experiences. His aesthetic seems to reflect an interest in powerful, gloriously damaged females, for example in American Horror Story and Feud. But even if viewers need another hilarious portrait of twisted female malevolence, nursing does not. The battle-axe and other female-oriented media stereotypes have played a key role in the global nursing shortage that takes countless lives, especially through under-staffing; the world needs millions more nurses than it has been willing to pay for. In fact, nurses as a class are not sociopathic monsters, but college-educated science professionals of all genders who monitor, evaluate, educate, advocate for, and save patients in a wide variety of settings, such as university hospital burn centers where a critically injured patient might go after a vehicle crash. Researchshows that too few nurses increases patient mortality–and that popular media stereotypes play a role in undermining nurses’ claims to respect and resources. Please join us in urging Ryan Murphy, Netflix, and all involved to consider whether “Ratched” can be done without reinforcing a devastating stereotype of a life-saving profession. If it happens despite our objections, please urge them to reduce the damage by introducing some nuance in the title character — it’s possible: Nurse Jackie was fatally flawed and supremely talented — and featuring other nurse characters with some of the positive traits of real nurses, such as expertise, courage, decency, and so on. Thank you.

Please click here to sign our petition!

And please add your own comments to the show in the comments box to personalize it. Thank you!

Revitalizing Yourself With Micro Breaks and Forest Bathing

Forest bathing, started in Japan in the 1990’s, is the practice of taking a short, leisurely visit to a forest for health benefits. However, if you are busy, unable to make the time to walk in the forest, there is research showing that taking micro breaks of 40 seconds, and simply looking at nature decreases mistakes and improves productivity. This week I hope you will give yourself time to tune into nature with the following videos. Relax and enjoy your connection to nature and yourself.

The queen bee surrounded by her court as she lays eggs in one of our hives! Who is in your court protecting you, guiding you and nurturing you?   (44 seconds)

Balance is something we practice. Even the sound of the rushing water can bring you back into balance as you watch Michael work. (6.9 minutes)

 

Louie Schwartzberg says we protect what we fall in love with.

You are a part of nature. How do you take care of yourself and your environment? (7.48 minutes) You can improve your attention and your state of being by taking mini breaks, even changing your screen saver can be a start. How often can you gaze out of a window? When was the last time you were in nature? Do you have living plants near you? What kinds of pictures do you have at your work station?

Do you have stones, crystals or a miniature zen garden near you?

Please share with us what you do to reduce your stress as it relates to being in nature…

You can also join Self Care for Vitality 

Free Virtual Connecting Weekly Call-in for Nurses
Wednesdays 6:30 – 7:00 pm
Phone 712-432-3066         Pin 177444
There is a short guided relaxation, followed by a short time for silence
in community and optional sharing.
We present tips and strategies for Self care on a variety of topics such as:
Setting boundaries, balance, healing, self love, vulnerability, and other topics as they arise.
It’s free to all and you can join in with a share or just listen in.
Have a great week being in or with nature.
With love, Padma

Jump Start Your Life With the Keystone Habit of Journaling

You can transform your life with a keystone habit. A keystone habit is one that influences other aspects of your life. Journaling, a keystone habit, gives you access to your authentic voice. It can be a centering practice and a source of guidance. Stumped for this week’s blog, I am happy to share with you that using one of my keystone habits, journaling, the topic was revealed. Over the years, I have developed a passion for journaling because it helps me in every area of my life. For example,journaling through a divorce and single parenting I maintained a steadiness and clarity that would not have otherwise happened.

Journal and journey have the same root. A deeply personal experience, journaling gives you a chance to relate to the parts of yourself that are clamoring to be heard. By putting your thoughts onto paper- journaling becomes a tool of discovery which can be fun, interesting and informative. It can broaden your understanding of unfolding events, clarifying health, relationship, career issues and whatever else is on your heart/mind. Even 5 or 10 minutes a day of time spent journaling may bring to light surprising options.

Depending upon your intentions, the circumstances of your life and your proclivities, different styles are useful: reflective/contemplative, lists, work notes/accomplishments, observations, gratitude journals, responses to events, letters to a higher power just to name a few. If you don’t like or can’t read your handwriting ~~ no excuse, you don’t have to write! You can use online options. AND/OR, you can use colored pens, pencils, pictures and collage with paper.   

To  start, consider why, how and when you want to journal.  Mornings can be good to set the tone for the day and before going to bed can be a great time for tying up loose ends of the day for a great night’s sleep. If you have concerns about privacy, there are many on line options to choose from. I prefer paper because doodling and glue help me to get to feelings and concepts that are illusive.  You will discover what works for you when you engage this private time with yourself. 

Additionally, you can journal with others.  In 2016 I gave the workshop Wisdom Journaling: Journaling for Clarity and Connection  at the AHNA Convention.  Participants enhanced their personal discoveries by sharing with the group and having others listen without judgement to their journaling discoveries and process. My children and I had fun journaling together and they both use journaling today, 20+ years later.

If you need more convincing to begin your journaling practice, Judy Willis MD, a neurologist, and former classroom teacher explains, “The practice of writing can enhance the brain’s intake, processing, retaining, and retrieving of information… it promotes the brain’s attentive focus … boosts long-term memory, illuminates patterns, gives the brain time for reflection, and when well-guided, is a source of conceptual development and stimulus of the brain’s highest cognition.”

Maybe you are already journaling. Please share with us how you journal. What mediums you use and why? What do you enjoy about journaling?  What are the benefits? How do you work with your need for privacy?

The Vitality in Progress: Healing and Preventing Burnout for Nurses, the 90 day program supports nurses in establishing 3 keystone habits.  Journaling is often chosen as one of the practices in addition to being one of the tools used in the program. The early bird discount has been extended, so if you sign up in the next week, you will be able to not only get the discount, but get support in building 3 keystone habits for your life.

In the meantime, you might want to journal after participating in the 

Self Care for Vitality 

Free Virtual Connecting Weekly Call-in for Nurses           Phone 712-432-3066       Pin 177444

Wednesdays 6:30-7:00 pm EST

There is a short guided relaxation, followed by a short time for silence
in community and optional sharing
We present tips and strategies for Self care on a variety of topics such as:
Setting boundaries, balance, healing, self love, vulnerability, and other topics as they arise.
It’s free to all and you can join in with a share or just listen in.
May your week be filled with clarity, beauty and inspiration.
With love, Padma

If you want to jump start yourself with a challenge:

https://www.wholelifechallenge.com/journaling-10-minutes-lifestyle-practice/

How-can-i-keep-a-personal-private-journal-online

How-to-do-a-proper-self-review-and-identify-your-professional-pain-points-before-your-boss-does

keep-a-work-diary-to-minimize-mistakes-and-document-successes

How-to-harness-the-mental-and-emotional-benefits-of-regular-writing

 

Do You Eclipse Your Own Brightness?

On August 21, 2017 our much smaller moon will cover our sun’s light for a full eclipse. For some, the sky will go black, it will appear to be night with stars shining in the middle of the day. Depending where you are on the path of the eclipse, there will be varying degrees of darkness or partial eclipses. With this, I am reminded of how unconscious  cultural and personal habits can eclipse a shining light. Joseph Campbell says, “The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are,” and yet too often, as a hospice nurse I heard  people say, “I wish I had … “, fill in the blank with an unexplored or unattempted dream. Don’t let this be your story.

Our nursing profession offers infinite and unique opportunities for you to manifest your loving heart and essential bright light. So, if you are not shining your light, what are the obstacles keeping you from doing so?  Self compassion is a profound acceptance of your being, regardless of successes and failures and is consequently different from self esteem which is having confidence in your own worth, or abilities. Self compassion is about how you treat yourself, how you talk to yourself and what you say to yourself. When you have self compassion, you recognize you are “a work in progress”- you are kind to yourself and get the help you need when you need it. With self compassion, you shine your light to remove the internal obstacles that eclipse it. Do  you give yourself self compassion?

Your answers to the following questions may indicate obstacles to your shine, preventing you from manifesting your gifts. 

  1. When someone gives you a compliment can you say “Thanks” without an explanation? Can you take in the positive without minimizing or deflecting it?
  2. Do you have unresolved anger and resentments that keep you from connecting with yourself and others?
  3. Are you procrastinating on taking your next career step? Why?
  4. Are you getting enough sleep regularly?
  5. Are you taking care of your spirit and are you happy?
  6. Are you taking good care of your body with proper nutrition?
  7. Are you getting enough exercise to feel fit?
  8. On a scale of 0-10 what is your confidence in taking new steps in your life?
  9. On a scale of 0-10, what is your shame factor?
  10. When was the last time you completed a PROQOL  (Professional Quality of Life) assessment?
  11. When you accomplish something do you take time to savor and appreciate your success, no matter how small?

Remember self compassion can start as a healing process. It is a lubricant for getting unstuck and is a muscle that can be developed. Learning and practicing it is a boon for us all since no one else can shine your beautiful, unique light. Sharing your gifts in the world is not only a source of happiness for you, but can be a source of inspiration and healing that benefits the world we live in. Removing whatever is eclipsing your light is a win/win.

There is an early bird discount for the next Vitality in Progress: Healing and Preventing Burnout for Nurses   which begins August 27, 2017.  We support you in changing habits that eclipse your light as you build your self compassion muscle, so you can  manifest your gifts and exercise your talents.

 

Please join us on our weekly phone call
Self Care for Vitality                    
Free Virtual Connecting Weekly Call-in for Nurses
Phone 712-432-3066
Pin 177444
Wednesdays 6:30-7:00 pm EST
There is a short guided relaxation, followed by a short time for silence
in community and optional sharing
 We present tips and strategies for Self care on a variety of topics such as:
Setting boundaries, balance, healing, self love, vulnerability, and other topics as they arise.
You can join in with a share or just listen in.
In the meantime, have a great week taking great care of yourself.
With love, Padma

Are You Shooting the 2nd Arrow?

What you do with the discomforts and pain that you experience in your life makes a huge difference in how you relate to yourself and others. Buddhists say anytime we suffer misfortune, 2 arrows come our way. The 1st arrow comes to you from the outside and may or may not be in your control. You may experience pain, disappointment, discomfort, sadness or anger. The second arrow is your response to that first arrow, taking the form of a judgement, criticism, shame, numbing or blame directed back at yourself or another. The question becomes, “is the 2nd arrow necessary?” It causes suffering on top of that 1st painful arrow.

What is your habitual response to the 1st arrow?


3 examples:

1. I made a mistake at work, a colleague brought it to my supervisor’s attention and then came to me to tell me what I’d done, how to correct it and how to prevent it. The first arrow was the mistake. Life happens and I make mistakes. That part of the experience was uncomfortable because I don’t like making mistakes and I was grateful for the fix and prevent information. However, at the end of the day and for some time afterwards, I experienced the habitual 2nd arrows of shame, inadequacy, wanting to blame someone, and wanting to numb the feelings with addictive behaviors and worries about what was going to happen as a consequence.  Days later, noticing the 2nd arrows, I began speaking kindly to myself, focusing on my breath, and feeling my body and feelings, without catastrophizing. I began to see the situation for what it was, stopped the 2nd arrows and moved on with whatever else was up for that day~~ lesson learned!

2. I had a patient who felt she had somehow caused her leukemia diagnosis.  Her guilt and fear are feelings based in judgments and not in reality. In shooting  the second arrow, she was less available to receive the support and love available for her. Shooting the second arrow  increased not only her own suffering but that of those who loved and wanted to help her. Do you know people who express guilt about bringing a health problem upon themselves and fear of becoming a burden?

3. The other day I felt a sharp pain in my lower back upon standing. I hobbled to work but had to leave early because of the pain. Days later, annoyed with the ongoing pain, I began feeling angry about my condition, for aging and for the ongoing spinal issues that I can do little about. When I realized that I was shooting the 2nd arrow, I just stopped and continued to allow myself to be quiet and rest and became inspired to write this post. 

 Young children and animals don’t seem to shoot 2nd arrows when they are not feeling well. Without judgments they do what they can, when they can- rest, heal and move about when they have the energy.

The key is becoming aware of your responses to life’s events. During this week, as you observe your responses to life’s events– discomfort, frustration, anger, disappointment, sadness, notice if and when you shoot yourself or others with arrows. Here’s the good news: you can choose to stop the 2nd arrow any time if you are aware. If shooting the 2nd arrow is a habit, it may take time and practice to stop or change it.  When you stop the criticizing, numbing behaviors, blaming, judgments and shame (the sources of your suffering), you increase your happiness and empower yourself with clarity to address what it is you can control.

Along that line, the early bird registration is discounted for the Vitality in Progress: Healing and Preventing Burnout for Nurses. In this on line program you receive lots of support for not shooting the 2nd arrow as you create your own Self care plan based upon your burnout  and self care assessments. 

 

And in the meantime, please join us on our weekly phone call.

Self Care for Vitality     

 

PAUSE to Nurture Your Vitality

Welcome to the pause. I invite you take a few minutes to slow down, breathe, and use your internal pause button. No need to do anything except be with yourself for a few minutes. I’ve provided a guided meditation to help facilitate the pause. All you have to is press play.

With Love, 
Padma


Vitality in Progress: Healing and Preventing Burnout for Nurses program
Takes you from WORKLOAD OVERWHELM AND BURNOUT and helps you to remember saying;
“I get so much satisfaction from being able to [help] people. I am a very caring person.” Get More Information and Sign Up Today.
For More Information >Vitality In Progress

Savor & Celebrate Each Step Of The Way

As a nurse, you acknowledge and celebrate the successes of others as they learn new skills, improve their healthy behaviors, or do well after a surgery. You may be getting kids to their games, classes or practices and showing up at your partner’s business functions, in addition to preparing meals. You get to work on time or maybe even early. You put in a full day of work possibly receiving accolades for your good work from colleagues and management and then go on to the next activity.

You show up for people and activities that depend upon you, but how are you showing up for yourself?  Are you putting your own needs onto a “back burner”? A word of caution: what’s on your back burner can, over time, cause you to feel frustrated, ashamed, disappointment and become yet another stressor by being an energy drain.

Some time ago, I had a file of cards, letters and pictures that I wanted to put into a book. I had been collecting these mementos for years, and eventually it became a daunting, overwhelming task to even consider addressing. I could feel my energy drain and my spirits drop, when ever I thought of it, so I’d put it back on the back burner. The same would happen when I thought about my living will.

The 4 stage process below is what I used to create my living will and to create a book designed to prevent such a pile up again. With those energy drains gone I began to feel so free. Savoring and celebrating every incremental step in this 4 stage process is the key to successfully decreasing, eventually eliminating your energy drains. You end up not only feeling better and having more energy but your perspective changes as a result of taking better care of yourself.  You actually change your brain, becoming more open to experiencing happiness. I can honestly say I don’t have any Back Burner Energy Drains at this time!

Rick Hanson,  neuropsychologist, author of Buddha’s Brain and teacher reports that our brains can be sculpted. You begin to rebuild the micro-circuitry to gradually shift the emotional shadings of your interior landscape by making positive experiences last by staying with them for 5, 10, even 20 seconds. This is the savoring process. Having a sense of happiness for your accomplishment is a form of celebration which you can do with or without others, enhancing your internal strength.

Savor and Celebrate Each Step as You Eliminate Your Back Burner Energy Drains

  1. Identify your Back Burner Energy Drains: Possibly inadequate sleep, no reflection/down time, poor exercise habits, unhealthy nutrition, a needed education or career move or even attention to your financial future, organizing your mementos, creating your living will…check inside yourself for any others.
  2. Discern which one to begin working on.
  3. Create an action plan of Specific, Small and Scheduled steps to address  that one Back Burner Energy Drain.
  4. Create an accountability process- partner or partners with whom you report, share, celebrate your process.

Delores, was describing her chaotic and hectic day as a prison counselor, where she has worked for over 20 years. She has been developing better ways of caring for herself at work including better food choices and not getting flustered so often. In the middle of her story she mentioned that she went into a safe room, sat down, closed her eyes, withdrew her attention from the concerns and chaos of the work scene and took a 2 minute meditation break. (This was a new behavior for her.) She also spoke with a trusted colleague about what she did.  At the end of the story before going on to the next topic, we spent time unpacking the experience of the new behavior. In that process she was able to more fully appreciate and savor the good feeling and empowerment it engendered.  The new behavior was a win.

Taking time to remember and re-experience it deepened the new neural pathways she is developing as she creates new Self care habits.  Identifying her Back Burner Energy Drain of not caring for herself at work, she started with a small step, acted on it and celebrated by sharing it with people on her accountability team making her stronger for herself and even possibly setting a different and healthy example for her colleagues. Giving yourself credit for your courageous decision to identify your Back Burner Energy Drains is empowering.

*** Savor and Celebrate***
Beginning to address Back Burner Energy Drains
increases your sense of self integrity.

  *** Savor and Celebrate***
Creating  the action plan is a success in its own right
because it is a start.

*** Savor and Celebrate***
Sharing with your accountability partner(s) enhances positive feelings,
the power of your accomplishments, decreases shame and inspires moving forward.

Each step of the way, acknowledging, and celebrating your successes and savoring the feelings makes the positive experiences last longer, changing your neural wiring . In the end your energy is improved from not only reducing the stress of your Back Burner Energy Drains as you eliminate them, but you experience an increased sense of happiness and well being.

The Vitality in Progress: Healing and Preventing Burnout in Nurses has an accountability process built into it and support for your personal celebration as you empower yourself with healthy habits and improved self esteem. Additionally, nurses receive 39 CNE’s upon successful completion along with 3 new healthy Self care habits.

What are your Back Burner Energy Drains? Please share with us your strategies for eliminating them and restoring your vitality.

Have a wonderful week making your positive experiences last longer, celebrating your successes and increasing your happiness and sense of well being.

With love, Padma

By the way, please join us on our weekly phone call.    Self Care for Vitality 

Free Virtual Connecting Weekly Call-in for Nurses   Phone 712-432-3066    Pin 177444
Wednesdays 6:30-7:00 pm EST
There is a short guided relaxation, followed by a short time for silence  in community and optional sharing. We present tips and strategies for Self care on a variety of topics such as: setting boundaries, balance, healing, self love, vulnerability, and other topics as they arise.

 

 

The Potency of Self Care Retreats

When was the last time you refreshed yourself with a retreat? Recently I returned to work from a 4 day retreat with a sense of optimism, contentment and emotional fullness as a result of engaging with the nourishing processes that supported my inner wisdom. Retreats and vacations are similar in that you take time away from your normal responsibilities. Both can be uplifting and renewing.  However, whether you take a “staycation” (not going away) or a vacation, the focus is usually outward- new people, places and, new experiences or working on projects in your home environment. The vacation may or may not be structured, and upon return you resume the schedule you left. With a retreat on the other hand,  your focus is inward using contemplation, reflection, meditation, Self or other inquiry, and possibly prayer. Often there is a structure to help you experience parts of yourself that are often not given time to be seen, heard or felt. After connecting more deeply with your Self, you return to your normal work and other responsibilities with greater insight, contentment and a sense of peace. The processes you practice on retreat often continue to nurture and fuel you into the future.

The goal of a retreat is to experience a sense of calm, a sense of oneness with what is, and a deeper experience of love and your inner wisdom.

When are you going to nurture your Self with a retreat?

There are so many kinds to choose from:

healing retreats

mindfulness retreats

nature retreats

retreats with a spiritual teacher

yoga retreats

silent retreats

12 Step Recovery retreats

what will nurture you?

If you don’t feel you can go somewhere and there is nothing locally available,
you can design a beautiful retreat for yourself.

The following are 6 suggestions and examples:

  1. When I had a limited income and my children still lived with me, they went to friends’ houses for a weekend, and I designed a 2 day retreat that included meditation, silence, reading, gardening, walking, journaling and plenty of sleep. I prepared by cleaning and preparing food before the kids left to optimize my inward focus time.  I told friends  I was unplugging- that I’d be in silence and available only for emergencies. This was not a “staycation”. Telling others of my intention was a way of creating accountability. Choosing to detach from all your electronic devices for a day or more can be very challenging, AND a totally nourishing experience after you go through the feelings of withdrawal- the compulsive reaching for your phone, the obsessive chatter in your mind and random feelings of FOMO- “fear of missing out,” which refers to the blend of anxiety, inadequacy and irritation.  Sticking to the intention of being on retreat at the end, was refreshing, wholesome and empowering.
  2. Our local holistic nurses association chapter offers an annual Self care one day retreat in September. It is a day designed for nurses to focus in community on ourselves. Catered and held in a beautiful setting, we meditate, engage in activities such as journaling, coloring and walking a labyrinth with the goal of nurturing the caregiver in us. There are opportunities for us to give and receive healing modalities such as Reiki, Healing Touch, massage and Therapeutic Touch which encourage discovery of joy, beauty and healing inside and outside of ourselves.
  3.  A few years ago a friend and I decided we wanted to share a retreat and to deepen our friendship. We designed a schedule of meditation, walking, and listening to a series of talks by a healer we had heard of. We tent camped in a state park, in silence for a weekend. It rained the full weekend, and except for laughter, we maintained our noble silence and had a memorable, enriching and powerful shared experience of a deeper friendship.
  4. A daily commitment to unplugging from technology for a given amount of time can be a mini retreat with yourself . “A retreat allows the mind to flow freely, to appreciate information and beauty instead of trying to process it. A quiet 15 minutes among nature can act as a personal daily spiritual retreat for some.” Done on a regular basis you can support your inner wisdom, especially if you combine it with journaling.
  5. Join us on our weekly phone call.    Self Care for Vitality
    Free Virtual Connecting Weekly Call-in for Nurses   Phone 712-432-3066    Pin 177444
    Wednesdays 6:30-7:00 pm EST
    There is a short guided relaxation, followed by a short time for silence  in community and optional sharing. We present tips and strategies for Self care on a variety of topics such as: setting boundaries, balance, healing, self love, vulnerability, and other topics as they arise.
    If you have not had a retreat in a while, maybe you want to consider the following:

 6.  Vitality in Progress is a structured, 12 week creative and healing home retreat to focus on your inner being. With our support you create your own Self care plan that invites you to tap into your inner wisdom as you explore the topics of commitment, habits, vulnerability, setting boundaries,  Self love, compassion, kindness and more. The next start date is August 27th, and there is an early registration discount going on now.

How often do you give yourself the gift of a retreat? Do you have a daily practice that feels like a mini retreat for you? Please share with us other types of retreats  you have used and use to nurture yourself.

Please take good care of you. Not only do you need to do so for your own sanity and well being, but your family, friends  and the world we live in wants and needs you to share your gifts and light. You can do this with greater ease by caring for your beautiful Self.

With love, Padma

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are You Grounded?

When you passed the NCLEX, you proved you were intellectually competent to provide care in the Western, allopathic health care industry. Your nursing interventions are grounded in evidence based on research and optimal outcomes. However, to survive or avoid the trauma of burnout, you need to be grounded in other ways. It is essential that you have or develop the qualities of being emotionally, mentally and spiritually grounded in addition to being educated. This means knowing yourself very well, which means being grounded in your body, heart and  values.

In the midst of chaos do you bring calm, or do you add to the chaos with knee jerk reactions and defensiveness? Do you become overwhelmed and paralyzed? Some qualities of a grounded person are calmness, sensibility, realistic, unpretentious, no- nonsense, present for/in the moment, legitimate and wise. On a scale of 0-10 where do you put yourself in terms of being grounded today?

Regardless of where you are on that spectrum of being grounded, certain situations may trigger you to become ungrounded and less effective in reducing a charge in you and your environment. The following  are 4 trustworthy techniques, which take only a few moments, and will help you to stabilize and enhance your groundedness. They can help to focus your thoughts, body, heart and your energy quickly.

  1. In the Vitality phone calls, recently we have been locating and visualizing the 7 energy centers, known as chakras. By grounding yourself energetically, you help yourself and the environment. The root or first chakra, located at the base of your spine, connects you to your body and to Earth which supports you. Try it now: Bring your attention to the base of your spine. (You may be able to sense the energy better if you close your eyes.) You can visualize the energy going from the base of your spine, down your legs, through your feet,  through the crust of the Earth and to the center of the Earth. You could also visualize yourself to be a beautiful tree with your energetic roots in the earth. By grounding yourself, you can energize yourself any time you are waiting. Standing in a line, feel your feet and connect to your own energy, body and Earth. This sure beats grumbling about the length of the line and the wait itself. It also gives your busy mind something positive to focus upon.
  2. Put your hand over your heart, mentally focus your attention on your chest region and visualize a person, place or animal who makes you feel love or loved. You can also remember an experience where you felt loved. Close your eyes to enhance the experience. By doing this you are energetically  grounding yourself in your own heart where love resides. Notice what happens for you after this process.
  3. Some nurses carry a small stone or special small token in their pocket. When they feel it, it is a reminder to pause, feel their feet on the ground and take a breath and return their awareness to the moment.
  4. Some nurses use contemplative, mindfulness and meditation practices as sources of grounding. This is a topic for another blog.

Recently my supervisor said she appreciated my calm on a crazy and hectic day. Well, that is the result of keeping myself grounded with practices that connect me deeply to myself and therefore I am available for others.

Grounding yourself is a process of getting to know yourself deeply. Grounding can start with your mind, body, heart or energy connecting you to your values, issues and intuitions. The more you know and understand your inner life the more empowered you are because you have choice in your responses to your life’s challenges . The integrity that develops with grounding yourself in practices that connect you to your inner life supports your confidence and creates healthy boundaries for yourself in the very demanding industry of health care.

Remember, how you respond in chaotic situations depends upon what you do in the non chaotic times. If you practice being grounded regularly, the tools and techniques will be there for you in the stressful times.

 

The next Vitality in Progress: Healing and Preventing Burnout

program begins August 27th. You can empower yourself with healthier boundaries, ground yourself with 3 Self-care tools of your choice and enjoy the experience of community with other nurses who are also either preventing or healing from burnout.

 

Please join us as we explore the 3rd chakra in the next week on our weekly call-in for Nurses.

 

 

Please share with us tools, techniques and practices that you use to ground yourself.

Take good care of yourself~~

With love, Padma

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