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Posts Tagged :

authenticity

Four Rivers Endings and Beginnings

We know the quality of one’s nursing practice, the presence and authenticity one brings to those in our care is influenced by our understanding of the events that happen in our lives. How you end your day is as important as how you start your day. You can affect the start of your next day and even your next 24 hours, by your preparation for restoration and sleep.

I am excited to share with you a beautiful new practice I am using that is a nourishing way to end the day. It extends the positives from the day, ties up loose ends so that the next day is truly fresh. Rick Hanson reminds us, that it is as if our brains are Teflon for the positive and Velcro for the negative. If you want to increase the neural networks for the positive, it is important to extend the time you spend with positive and beneficial experiences. You may be doing this during the day as you experience gratitude or moments where you refocus upon your breath, coming back to your center. However, how often do you brush your teeth, plop into bed, fall asleep as your head is hitting the pillow and wake up with an alarm, feet barely touching the ground, as you dash off into the day? I have changed my nighttime routine. I now answer the following 4 questions from Angeles Arien, cultural anthropologist, educator, and award winning author. She speaks of the Four Rivers of life that nourish us and help us to grow.

1. River of Inspiration. What and/or who inspired you today? In what way or how?
2. River of Challenge. What challenged you to leave your comfort zone? Did you accept the challenge?
3. River of Surprise. What “came out of the blue” today for you?
Staying aware of these mysteries of life can help you move in new directions.
4.  River of Love. How or in what ways did love touch you today?

These questions encourage your reflections on the mystery of being alive, discerning what is important and guiding you to explore your own depths. In the process of answering these  questions regularly, you develop a new intimacy with your Self. Angeles Arien says,  “Intimacy  is, ‘Into Me See’ “.

This practice has added focus to my nursing practice and added a new dimension of closeness with my husband as we share our experiences of the Four Rivers. I also discovered one of my biggest challenges is my shyness around “putting myself out there” in the social media world. And, here I am doing it!

By ending your day in this nourishing way, you too may experience good sleep and a rich next day with focus and clarity. It benefits not only you, but your clients, students, colleagues, patients, family and friends. Perhaps you will enjoy your life and daily experiences even more as you open to your Four Rivers- Love, Surprise, Challenge and Inspiration.

Please share with us what comes up for you as you explore the Four Rivers of Love, Surprise, Challenge and Inspiration. How does this exploration affect your nursing practice and your personal life? What does the practice feel like for you?

We support your Four Rivers exploration here:

  
With love, Padma

Healing, Authenticity and the Paradox of Boundaries

Boundaries are elusive, energetic, practical, conceptual and permeable. Understanding your boundaries is essential to compassionate, healthy relationships with your Self, your family, your friends, and your employers. Living an authentic life means knowing your limits — your boundaries around what is okay/not okay — and making it clear to yourself and others.

Boundaries maintain your integrity. But setting boundaries isn’t just about saying “no” or carving out time for self care (although it is about those things). What about your actual, physical space? The fact is, each living being is an electromagnetic energy field (invisible to all but a few highly sensitive folks). That energy extends beyond our bodies, commingling with the energy fields of others. In other words — we are all connected.

Your boundaries will change depending on who you’re with, how you’re  feeling, what you eat, how much time you have, and what’s going on in your electromagnetic space.  Your fields — internal and external, personal and professional — swirl together with those of your peers like one of those colored moving sand art toys.

So essentially, boundaries aren’t just “yes or no,” or “set it and forget it.” They’re permeable, ever-changing, and largely conceptual. Legal and professional boundaries provide protection for health, well being and healing.

Nurse Practice Acts of each state basically agree:
“Patients can expect a nurse to act in their best interests and to respect their dignity. This means that a nurse abstains from attaining personal gain at the patient’s expense and refrains from jeopardizing the therapeutic-patient relationship. In order to maintain that trust and practice in a manner consistent with professional standards, nurses need to be knowledgeable regarding professional boundaries and work to establish and maintain those boundaries.” The nurse’s interior influences what happens in the care recipient, and vice versa —  so nurturing healthy boundaries is both  ethical and professional. Preventing burnout, is elemental to the process of protecting the sacred bond that exists between nurses and those they care for. It is also important for healthy employee/employer relationships.

How you practice Self care, and how you care for your mind and heart, has a direct influence on your consciousness.
It’s the first and most important piece in creating authentic connection — to your Self and to others. The trick is to simultaneously recognize and honor your boundaries and your interconnectedness. Celebrate your uniqueness as an individual and your connection with others. Imagine a big sound echoing off a mountain. Although we may no longer hear the sound, it rises up and continues to reverberate in time and space. Just because you can’t see something (like the electricity that turns on the light, or the electromagnetic fields connecting you to every other living thing) doesn’t mean it’s not there. Such is the illusive nature of boundaries, and the value of understanding our connectedness as humans, as caregivers and care recipients.

A recent participant in the VIP program spoke of signing off on letters with “Take care… Give care.” Good Self care makes it possible to both give and receive, recognizing the paradox and fluidity of boundaries, and the ethical imperative of preventing burnout by setting healthy personal and professional boundaries.

What are your experiences of your boundaries being crossed, maintained, and permeable? How do you experience your electromagnetic field?  What do you think about the idea that preventing burnout is an ethical issue?

Let me know.

Take care of yourself…

With love,

Padma

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